The zoo

Every once in awhile, my wife and I have a day when we feel like we are fantastic parents. Not often, but occasionally this is the case. Friday we had that satisfaction - we took our kids to the zoo.

The children thoroughly enjoyed the 6 hours we spent there. It was fun, but after hour #4, the magic starts to wear off and I start to lose interest. My ADD starts to kick in and I begin pondering such things a "I wonder what that animal would taste like grilled?" Mmmm....meat.

There were only a few animals that we didn't see. We hit all the major ones though. i.e. polar bears, elephants, tigers, lions, gorillas etc. There were a few highlights to the day of course. One of which, was that our youngest daughter voluntarily held a boa constrictor. A zoo employee was holding the snake, allowing people the opportunity to hold and pet it.(At least, I hope he was a zoo employee. Now that I think about it, I did think it was odd he was stationed in the parking lot sitting in the back of his van that had a Wizard mural painted on the side of it. It seemed unprofessional of him to not wear a shirt as well. hmmm...)

She hopped right up to him and allowed the man to put the snake on her lap. My wife and I both looked at each other in amazement. She's so unpredictable. I was very proud of her bravery. I, on the other hand, would not do that. You see, I hate snakes, they scare the bicripson out of me. The zoo employee informed us that the snake was harmless to humans, and assured us that most snakes do not pose a danger to humans. Whatever, man. If I see a snake around my house, I will scream like a little girl and if I have a shovel, I will chop its head off. He said that people kill snakes out of ignorance. If so, consider me an idiot. Ick.

The other highlight of the day occurred at the weasel display. My wife said to me, "Have you seen what's going on in there?" as she pointed to the animals behind the glass. I looked up to see 2 creatures, ummm, "wrestling" with each other. The children apparently accepted the explanation that the weasels were "wrestling" as they eventually moved on to the next exhibit. That was a lot of nature happening in there. It was funny watching people's reaction to the "wrestling match". Adults would stroll by, trying to figure out exactly was going on with the tangled pulsating clump of grey fur, and once the realty of the situation hit them, their eyes would widen and uneasy laughter soon followed. Kids were pointing with quizzical looks. Whispers and giggles filled the room. Parents hurriedly ushered their children past the amorous activities. The scene would've made a great video for Captain and Tennille's "Muskrat Love".

6 hours at the zoo is plenty. Some might even say 3 hours too long. Overall, the kids loved it and my wife and I enjoyed ourselves too. We felt like we had successfully performed our parental duties that day. Lord knows there are many days when we fail miserably.

At the end of the day, we recapped the kids' favorite animals. The 4 year-old stated she really liked the owl("coz it's head turned all the way around"), the other 2 really liked the condor ("because it flapped it's wings really wide"), and they all liked the zebras for some strange reason. Personally, I view them as just uniquely painted horses.

As for me, I liked the polar bears. For being so huge, they really are graceful creatures, especially as they swim laps in the water. Also, the gorillas are incredible animals that are somewhat mesmerizing to watch. Both were very impressive.

But neither are nearly as entertaining as weasels.